Watches

Before watches were invented, nobody had any responsibilities. People would wander around in streets and markets, grinning and giving each other phony nods as though to say “yes, exactly where we said we’d be”. This beautiful harmony was ruined when one day, a small child said she didn’t understand, and something had to be done. While inventing a self-powered chronometer was no small task for the town elders, they were comforted in that they’d already had the girl swiftly, but gently, catapulted over the city walls (some transcripts say “through”). Such was the advent of the “watch”, so-named because it gives you something to look at while you wait for a miserable time to end, or, better yet, when you’re waiting for one to start (some transcripts say “Sunday”).