Updated: May 7, 2019
In grade school, we were taught that the solar system consists of the sun, nine planets, and their moons. They also taught us that abstinence is the best form of birth control, but my high school had a built-in daycare, so what did they know? Perhaps the most controversial planet is Pluto, whose small size, distance from the sun, and general noncommittal attitude have led to several reclassifications to either planet or dwarf-planet. Making matters worse for the little guy, another object was discovered that is three times farther from the sun, and larger than Pluto. Many scientists felt that if Pluto gets to be classified as a planet, then this new one should be too, and they’ve been stomping their feet and holding their breath until they get their way. In a display of utter disrespect, Jupiter has a moon that’s larger than Pluto, has an atmosphere, and even volcanoes – which is like when the RV in someone’s driveway has cleaner water and better internet than your house.