Houseplants

Houseplants are a great way to decorate your home, as well as confuse the social identities of small trees. Houseplants got their start as a prank at house parties, wherein guests would subtly relocate plants from the host’s garden to places inside the home with the goals of both beautifying the hideous abode (all houses were ugly back then), and providing a makeshift alternative to crowded restrooms. After many frustrating mornings of moving smelly shrubs back outside, party hosts relented and stationed plants throughout the house, as though to say “someone already got us.” Now it’s considered totally acceptable to keep tasteful foliage indoors, so long as you put up a sign clarifying that your bathroom is actually available. Lastly, please note that it is not recommended to replant indoor plants outside. They’re too domesticated, and the other plants will make fun of them for being homeschooled.